How Do I Cope With Stress - a self-test.

How Do I Cope With Stress - a self-test.

Written by: Pippa Thackeray

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Stress is the plague of our modern era. We are constantly stimulated by external pressures as well as the stresses that come with simply being alive in our bodies and conscious of the passing of time.


Sounds pretty depressing, right? Well yes. But here is a quiz that could take you one step closer to a solution. And whilst it is not about completely avoiding stress (good luck with that one), it is about how you can handle it. Think of it like your secret weapon to finding what is true for you, so that it is possible to put a more positive spin on this so-called “never ending battle of stress”.

"It's not stress that kills us; it is our reaction to it."

Hans Selye, Pioneering Hungarian-Canadian Endocrinologist

Taking away the doom and gloom: Why your coping style really matters

We all experience stress, almost all of the time. To be exact, the daily production of cortisol is thought to be around 9–11 mg. Cortisol, known as the "stress hormone," kicks in to help the body tackle stress, balance blood sugar, keep blood pressure steady, reduce inflammation, support the immune system, regulate energy and metabolism, and even influence our sleep-wake rhythm.


In simple terms, you want to keep cortisol in this sweet spot to keep stress manageable, blood sugar steady, and energy flowing just right. As Hans Selye, the pioneer of stress research, pointed out, "It's not stress that kills us; it is our reaction to it." And, even on a chemical level, it is our understanding of stress that will truly come to our rescue.


Why coping mechanisms for stress were studied


Theories related to good stress management aren’t just plucked out of thin air; they’re grounded in decades of pioneering research by psychologists such as Richard Lazarus and Susan Folkman, published in 1984. While behaviourists at the time treated the mind as a “black box” between stimulus and response and deemed it unworthy of study, Lazarus argued that how we perceive events in our lives will have direct, physiological effects on our bodies.


Every human being is different and so the way you deal with stress can either leave you feeling frazzled or help you to glide through life’s challenges with a little more ease. Luckily, we've put together this quiz to help you find the coping style you relate to most.

The four coping styles: Find out which is yours

Ever notice how you react when stress rears its ugly head? Maybe you dive into problem-solving mode, or distract yourself to diffuse the tension, the list goes on.


But firstly, let’s take a look at the four main coping styles.


  • Problem focused coping
    You might be a problem-focused coper. When faced with stress, you tackle the issue head-on, breaking it down into manageable tasks and taking action.

    “Problem-focused coping includes all the active efforts to manage stressful situations and alter a troubled person-environment relationship to modify or eliminate the sources of stress."

  • Emotion focused coping
    If you’re all about the zen, this one’s for you. As Eckhart Tolle famously said, "Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there.'" By staying present, you keep the stress at bay.

    "Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there." — Author, Eckhart Tolle

  • Social coping
    If this applies to you, then you're not alone in your stress. You access resources via your social circle. Whilst it isn’t always helpful, you may find that venting to a friend or getting advice can make a world of difference if done in a constructive manner.

    An individual reduces stress by seeking emotional or instrumental support from their community.

  • Avoidant coping
    Sometimes, ignoring stress feels like the easiest route. Distracting yourself with Netflix or scrolling endlessly might offer temporary relief. But the stressor? 

    It’s still lurking in the background due to this somewhat unhelpful behaviour.

If any of these you think you might be leaning towards, read on as you take the quiz to find the answer. To provide some constructive feedback, there are also some tips provided to cater to the coping style identified.

Take the quiz: What’s your coping style?

Let’s get down to business — simply tick ONLY four of the statements that feel most like you:


A


□ “I feel better once I’ve got a plan to tackle the issue.”

□ “Solving problems helps me feel in control.”

□ “I dive straight into action when things get overwhelming.”

□ “I prefer to think before I react.”


B


□ “I find comfort in seeing the silver lining.”

□ “Mindfulness or deep breathing helps me calm down.”

□ “A good laugh can help me handle anything.”

□ “I accept what I can’t change and focus on moving forward.”


C


□ “Talking things through makes me feel lighter.”

□ “I rely on my mates or family when I’m stressed.”

□ “Knowing I’ve got support makes stress easier to handle.”

□ “Sharing my feelings helps me process what’s going on.”


D


□ “I distract myself with hobbies or entertainment when stressed.”

□ “Ignoring the issue feels easier in the moment.”

□ “I procrastinate when things get too much.”

□ “Escaping through TV or social media helps me cope a lot of the time.”

Here’s the verdict…

What your ticks reveal


  • Mostly ticks in one category (between 2–4): This is your primary coping style. If most of your ticks land in problem-focused coping, for example, you’re likely someone who tackles stress by diving into solutions and taking control.

  • One tick in each category: You tend to be adaptable, using a mix of strategies depending on the situation.

  • Even split across two or more categories: You have a natural blend of several styles. If you scored evenly in social coping and emotion-focused coping, for example, you will likely handle stress by reaching out to others and keeping your emotions steady.

What does your stress style mean?

  1. You’re mostly problem-focused:
    You’re a doer. Stress doesn’t stand a chance when you’re around. Your go-to move is action, and that’s what keeps you grounded.

  2. Mostly emotion-focused:
    You’re the calm in the storm. Managing your feelings is your superpower, and it helps you stay balanced even when things get tough.

  3. Mostly social coping:
    You’re all about connection — talking it out and leaning on your support network helps you navigate life’s pressures with ease.

  4. Mostly avoidant coping:
    You prefer a little escapism. While it helps take the edge off, remember to face the music when it matters most.

Why understanding coping mechanisms matters for the good of your health

Stress isn’t just an emotional burden, it can most certainly wreak havoc on your health too. Whilst it is easy to pass it off as ‘the everyday’, exposure to acute or chronic states of stress can be damaging to our immune system, heart health, and gut health, and even put you at risk for obesity or diabetes (Type 2).


On a more positive note, by understanding stress and how you cope with it, you can begin to put better protocols in place in order to protect both your mental and physical health.


Some quick tips for finding a balanced approach


It is time to turn insight into action points. Hopefully, you have some new findings from this quiz, or at the very least, some appreciation for the self-reflection this practice may have enabled for you.


Thinking of the bigger picture


Ultimately, stress and your reaction to it is extremely personal and unique. Yet, if you do sense an imbalance in your thinking, this is your opportunity for constructive change.


  • If you’re problem-focused, break stressors into smaller tasks, make a plan, and tackle what you can control.

  • Emotion-focused? Try leaning more into practices such as mindfulness, positive reframing, and limiting exposure to emotionally triggering things to stay grounded and set boundaries for yourself.

  • For social coping, both reaching out early and asking for help is potentially beneficial, but it is important not to rely on this mechanism solely, and to instead turn inwards occasionally to find some inner peace and harmony.

  • If you tend to try and avoid stress altogether, it is recommended to set limits on distractions, pair downtime with small tasks, or even to simply take gradual steps towards the issue in hand.

Most of us will likely use a combination of several styles, and there is no single ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way. That said, it is important to remain flexible and self-aware. 


There is a famous quote from William James, American philosopher and psychologist: "The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another", which sums it all up quite neatly. 

Is that so long to stress?

No, not quite. As mentioned previously, stress is simply a part of life, but it doesn’t have to control you, nor does it have to determine the outcomes for your health and wellbeing. By understanding your coping style and making a few tweaks, you can handle whatever life throws your way with stress management tools. It is possible to embrace stress, to own it, use it to thrive and, most importantly, by getting out of survival mode.


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This article is for informational purposes only, even if and regardless of whether it features the advice of physicians and medical practitioners. This article is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice. The views expressed in this article are the views of the expert and do not necessarily represent the views of healf